Missing the Retreat

I've been having a major flare. Well it feels majorm im in constant pain, of course cant stay out of the bathroom and I have zero appetite. Im drinking a lot but it all messes with my stomach and feez dont dare I eat even a bite a day :(

My small group at church is going on their retreat this weekend to the lake. Crohn's told me I cant go.  It sucks. I was looking forward to it big time. But how can I go sleep in a cabin with 10 people when im using the bathroom every 10min, weak from not eating, and yeah cant you picture me up until 4 or 5am and theyre getting up a few hours later smh.  The logistics dont work out. So thanks for stopping me once again crohn's.  I honestly feel its better than going and being miserable. I'll stay home and make special plans with my bestie :) she always knows how to lift my spirits when im down or in a flare. She gets it. And THATS what I need!

Insomnia Overload

So I ran out of my ambien because ive needed more of it to sleep lately. So I havent had it in a week and a half and I havent slept at night since I ran out. My doctor put me on something new called Belsomra but ive doubled the dosage and NOTHING.  Im not falling asleep until 8am every day/night, whatever you want to call it.  And then im sleeping off and on for a few hours, horribly, and then im wide awake again. So im incredibly sleep deprived. I have to wait until Monday to reach my doctor again. I dont know how much longer I can handle this. To top it off, my appetite has been nonexistent,  my stomach is very upset, my head is killing me and im super stressed. I know if I got some rest, id be better. At least id be able to deal with the other issues. But for now, im just too exhausted.  I give up

Its 5:01am...ive been trying to go to sleep for 4 hours now. I've really given up at this point. There's no point stressing over it when I know it wont happen for a few more hours anyway. Ugh!!! Sucks so bad

Sometimes any answer is best

The doctor can't explain why I slept the way I did and cant remember those several days. He's sending me another neurologist. This is frustrating. People keep saying well no news is good news. Forget that!! To a sick person, no news means no answers means I have to stay sick because they can't fix it! This is no way to live. Don't get me wrong, this is waayyy better than pre transplant.  But daily diarrhea,  vomiting, extreme fatigue,  and constant pain is not fun. And it's not normal! But it looks like I have no choice but to make it normal ugh.

I read an article about the effects of Crohn's disease on the brain and how it causes migraines and memory loss after about 10 years after onset of the disease.  Which I where I am (I was diagnosed 7 years ago,  but I was sick for several years prior to actually going to a doctor). I will find the article and post it on a separate post! It's so interesting and I think all of us crohnies and our caregivers need to read it and give it to your GI! It may actually explain my problems and my doctors are oblivious!  I'm plnning on taking to my gi, neurologist,  and oncologist.  I will let you know their feedback! :)

Yep I Got That Too

Since my blog is about my journey in Crohn's disease and my stem cell transplant, many of my followers and even friends, don't know all the other health issues I carry with me. I posted below pics of other health problems I have to deal with on a daily basis. Some have information attached,  some just state the problem. And some, as you will see, are very personal and this is the first time I have ever come out publicly. You will know what I mean when you get there. The point of this post is not to "show off" all my problems and definitely not for sympathy. I'm merely giving you a bit of insight in to the world of, well, me. And I hope some of them can help some of my readers feel more relatable and even give them more confidence and courage to seek medical attention for problems they may have as well! So here it goes!

Side note: I am seriously diagnosed with these issues. I am by far not a hypochondriac.  I would trade anything in the world to not have the health problems I have, but this is the life I've been given and there's no point in denying any of it. And if anyone of my fellow crohnies or loved ones of Crohn's patients know, many of these illnesses come hand in hand with autoimmune diseases such as Crohn's disease.